diff --git a/royalnet/alchemist/__init__.py b/royalnet/alchemist/__init__.py
index 1050b2d3..8ce214bb 100644
--- a/royalnet/alchemist/__init__.py
+++ b/royalnet/alchemist/__init__.py
@@ -1,23 +1 @@
-from royalnet.typing import *
-import sqlalchemy as sa
-import sqlalchemy.orm as saorm
-
-
-__all__ = (
-    "Alchemist",
-)
-
-
-class Alchemist:
-    """The Alchemist module connects to a relational database with SQLAlchemy."""
-
-    def __init__(self,
-                 engine_args: Iterable[Any],
-                 engine_kwargs: Mapping[str, Any]):
-        self.engine: sa.engine.Engine = sa.create_engine(*engine_args, **engine_kwargs)
-        self.Session: Union[saorm.sessionmaker, Type[saorm.Session]] = saorm.sessionmaker(bind=self.engine)
-
-    def add_metadata(self, metadata: sa.MetaData):
-        """Bind a MetaData object to the engine, and create all tables linked with it."""
-        metadata.bind = self.engine
-        metadata.create_all()
+from .func import *
diff --git a/royalnet/alchemist/func.py b/royalnet/alchemist/func.py
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..9038b63d
--- /dev/null
+++ b/royalnet/alchemist/func.py
@@ -0,0 +1,30 @@
+from ..typing import *
+import sqlalchemy
+
+
+def ieq(one, two):
+    """
+    Create a case-insensitive equality filter for SQLAlchemy. ::
+
+        lower(one) == lower(two)
+
+
+    """
+    return sqlalchemy.func.lower(one) == sqlalchemy.func.lower(two)
+
+
+def ineq(one, two):
+    """
+    Create a case-insensitive inequality filter for SQLAlchemy. ::
+
+        lower(one) != lower(two)
+
+
+    """
+    return sqlalchemy.func.lower(one) != sqlalchemy.func.lower(two)
+
+
+__all__ = (
+    "ieq",
+    "ineq",
+)